Blending into Danish culture - the unwritten rules.

Photographs: Pexels

Text: Natália Šepitková

Full integration into the new community requires knowledge of written and unwritten local rules. Perhaps you, too, have encountered a viral video on social networks about the eight unwritten rules of Danish society in various variations. These include practices like removing shoes indoors, tipping is not expected, being quiet on public transport, properly recycling, punctuality, queuing patiently, standing on escalators on the right side, and dressing modestly. Adapting to many other aspects is essential for success in Danish society.

Let’s meet in week 41

Danes don’t like unexpected visitors or plans. Don’t assume you can make spontaneous plans with Danes. Plan at least a week in advance, preferably months. And here comes the most amusing part. Danes structure their lives around weeks. Forget scheduling for the second half of September or the first Saturday in October. Danes base their schedule on the number of weeks. For example, everyone knows that the one-week autumn break for schools is in week 42 each year, and it isn't easy to reach someone in the office during weeks 27, 28, 29, and 30 because they will most likely be on summer vacations.

But it should be noted that Danes like to socialise a lot. Another (but I am sure not only Danish) phenomenon is arranging coffee meetings as a tool for networking. Understanding and embracing the Danish way of "kaffemøder", which prioritises genuine connections and knowledge-sharing over self-promotion, is good. It is standard for Danes to meet their future boss for coffee in a friendly atmosphere. Many career advisors and job hunters highly recommend asking for coffee meetings with potential employers. And don’t forget to be on time for meetings – everywhere.

Casual with each other

It is not only the coffee meeting culture that points to the informality of the Danes. You might have been surprised when you realised that Danes address each other by their first names not only among friends but also in official communication, at offices, at the doctor's, at school, or work. Although Danes don’t have a word for “please” (they replace it with various other phrases), they say “tak” (thank you) for everything.

However, do not confuse casualness with warmth. Usually, Danes don’t greet each other with kisses on the cheek or a handshake, but just with a “Hej”. It is also uncommon for Danes to use many polite phrases; they sometimes seem too direct or rude. They get straight to the point. Another interesting thing about Danish culture is that Danes do not sit beside a stranger on public transport as long as other seats are available.

"Equality and respect for others are highly valued. Everybody has to be on the same level; no one wants to make others feel bad by showing off. “We’re not used to people that shine, and that’s the biggest factor of Danish culture." - Bærbach Bas.

Janteloven

The Law of Jante describes the nature of Scandinavians. It is a social code across Scandinavia that emphasises collective achievements over individual ones. The term originates from a Norwegian author, Axel Sandemose, who satirised a small Scandinavian town called Jante in his novel 'A Fugitive Crosses His Tracks.' In Jante, people are encouraged to be modest, find joy in everyday life, and prioritise the collective above the individual. The novel outlines ten rules for societal behaviour, centring around one principle: Do not consider yourself superior to others. This principle acts as a cultural touchstone for the Danes.

Equality and respect for others are highly valued. Everybody has to be on the same level; no one wants to make others feel bad by showing off. “We’re not used to people that shine, and that’s the biggest factor of Danish culture,” Bærbach Bas explained for The Local DK. “When you look at our population in Denmark, we have a large percentage of middle class and a tiny percentage of rich and poor. So we have seen that being in the middle is good, and it has brought us to a good place as a country.”

The Jante Law is also related to how Danes dress for work, usually sit down to lunch together, and why they never talk to colleagues and friends about how much they earn. On the contrary, they like to complain to each other about the cost of the rent of the house. And a last unwritten rule if you wish to succeed in Danish society: Comply with the rules!

Three handy unwritten rules:

#1 Don’t take the last piece of whatever is left on the shared plate. If you want the last piece, no matter how small, you should ask if anyone else wants it or cut it in two and leave a minuscule slice.

#2 Forget about jaywalking. Did you know you could be fined if you cross the street outside the pedestrian crossing?

#3 Don’t bike on the left side of the bike lanes. That’s reserved for the fast drivers. And remember to signal with your hand when you stop or change your riding direction.